| quiet |
[Jan. 14th, 2008|11:18 pm] |
the cold drives them away
I wish it was frozen every day
every parking space empty
not a voice to pierce the air
the summer brings them in waves
and they ride the amber grains
the confection aids the confusion
there is no solution
bring me peace
bring me quiet
let me drown you out
let me slide away
bring me dreams
bring me desires fulfilled
of a life without the need
for all of this metropolis
the only time
that is worth the fire
to take it higher
and live in the atmosphere
the only time
that is worth the hours
is when the power
runs thin and lights grow dim
I don't want to understand
I don't want to blend in
I don't want to meet the man
or walk beside the woman
I don't want the betterment
I don't want the incompetence
I want the utter lack of person
I want the lack of human diversion
bring me peace
bring me quiet
bring me silence
end this torment
bring me peace
bring me quiet
bring me the absence
of the plague running free and immature |
|
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| my city |
[Jan. 14th, 2008|11:08 pm] |
they argue
who hit who?
they argue
no one's point is getting through
they get louder
the point gets cloudier
someone is going downtown
someone is raging now
welcome to my city
I wasn't born here
I doubt I'll die here
why do I live here?
they yell
and they scream
and I dream
that they would shut the fuck up
the night grows deeper
my resolve gets weaker
to stop myself from going down
and sending one into a concrete muzzle
welcome to my city
these are the days
of misdeeds and misgivings
there's no money anywhere else
this many people
in one place
lose your soul
hide your face
raise your voice
raise a hand
no one cares
as soon as you understand that
you'll fit right in |
|
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| it never stops |
[Jan. 14th, 2008|11:03 pm] |
I don't need you to second guess me
I don't need you to undress me
I don't need to be addressed for
I don't need the guilt I hold anymore
a thousand lives of constant sorrow
would not be enough to cleanse this hollow
trite and cliche, the world has heard enough
but the pain never ends, it never stops
I don't need to break a mirror
I don't need it any less clearer
I don't need a second dose of shame
I don't need to play children's games
a thousand days of the reaper's blade
a thousand days living in a shallow grave
a thousand serpents of temptation
a thousand waves of isolation
a million sins and stains that bind
a million earths to sift through blind
a million grains of sand through my hands
it never stops, it never ends |
|
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| under the eyes of the gods |
[Jan. 7th, 2008|10:45 pm] |
I didn't walk out of the house today
I stood behind the curtains in mind
I felt the sun on my face today
I stood behind the camera's eye
the buildings like fingers
pointing up all in praise
to let the gods know
we'll come home some day
I didn't see people or call on those
I stood on the terrace and never made myself known
watching the wind and the clouds float across
this is the price my friends, this is the cost
the buildings like tombstones
they rob us of days
and we're holden to the lifestyle
we're holden to the wage
as I drive on the highway
and see the faces intertwined
you can see the agony of repetition
and choices roll in the mind
I dream of the glacier
I dream of the rolling hills
of a place with true winter
of a place to fill the gods will
I dream of a place
where the boxed air doesn't kill me
where I can walk out and breathe
and my eyes don't feel like burning
I dream of a day
with no human in sight
staring up at the mountains
staring out over the countryside
under the eyes of the gods |
|
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| liars and charlatans |
[Jan. 7th, 2008|10:41 pm] |
there are things
and there are people
who are just
no god damned good and
are just plan sickly evil
look at a child
like you look at a wife?
if the state had any balls
they'd take you at the knife
or the man who takes life
like a horse takes it's grain
if he were an animal
you'd put him down
for being deranged
but we must pay attention to feeling
and we must pay attention to grace
and while you pay attention to politics
watch the cretins do cartwheels on your grave
the man in the steeple
uses his god
and the power of Jesus
don't you find it odd?
you drive a beater
without any heater
and he drives a Royce
on any day of his choice
or the man who sits high
on the hill of the militia
and has only one thing
on his private agenda
maybe some books
maybe the crown
all of it while passing none down
wonder why it never comes round
but it's all for the common good
so pay attention to your idols in Hollywood
and mind the newsmongers who like to play truthgivers
as they all do a jig on your grave |
|
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| george |
[Jan. 7th, 2008|10:33 pm] |
the king's a right bastard
he taxes us out
found himself a wellspring
to help himself out
and for his endevaours
and every colony in name
he works us without asking
send us poor to our grave
George, may you burn
we spurn your advances
you can have your damn crown
and we'll take your molasses
the bay will turn brown
and your tea can all drown
come to the shore with your guns
we'll burn your governors down
with some from the French
and some from the Indians
through a winter so cold
and so low on provisions
through the great slave debate
and the war of the states
we saw that no man
would hold over us again
to the enemy unseen
we know he doesn't exist
but he makes a fair profit
on the fear that he gives
so we'll take all your freedoms
and watch you morn, day, and night
you've got no say in it all
by the legacy of King George's might
no there's no king in America
this much is true
but you don't need a weathervane
to see which way the wind blew
and the same nepotism
that choked down the crown
they may have given the sceptre
but they're the same old fucking crowd
the madness of the king
who is is in all but title
led himself, his clan
to a fascist revival
and the knaves who stayed
long after the wagon had came
hope you enjoyed what you lost
giving up what your forefather's got |
|
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| things |
[Dec. 9th, 2007|11:03 pm] |
sit in the room
and stare at the gun
I hope god is watching over you
and stops you before your work begun
you feel you need to walk away
but why take others just to say?
life is a game
in which we mostly fail
I've felt the sorrow
and I've seen my flesh
turn the whitest pale
as if you're wearing the final veil
walk down the street
to the car with bag in hand
don't want to hurt them
and no one seems to understand
but if you do, misunderstanding won't be what they remember, of you
life is a losing proposition
some say the answers
are in the books of varied religion
wake up and go to work
enjoy the nights or days when off
but the cost to make the statement you have in mind
it's of the monstrous kind
and so it's over now
you're in a bag, soon to ground
they'll scrutinize your words and your life
try to find the reason so
they can stop the next one who
decides to treat others as a toy
but these people aren't GI Joes
the little plastic men, you knew
blown up with firecrackers, no harm no foul
the blood is real
and when they cry, when they're just about to die
and you turn the gun on yourself to go
couldn't you have left them all alone
I guess we'll never know |
|
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| |
[Dec. 9th, 2007|10:58 pm] |
it'd be so easy
to have Jesus with me
and I respect his work
if not take the place they give him
use him for a shield
use him for a reel
to hook the weak
and to fleece the sick
it's easy to sell heaven
and make the image stick
when you wear Armani
and have a Mercedes in the back
but your congregation
represent the lowest slice of the nation
living check to check
and they devote some to you
to hope you can get through to God
and help them do what no one can ever do
so you burn, in hell
heaven didn't make you
but the devil may have sent you
to prey on those who pray
and you take their savings away
so you can see a brighter day
but if the entrance fee to heaven is good work
I'd like to see you try to pay that way
along came a vision
and he told you to not resign
because if you did
you'd become much maligned
but the credit card receipts
and the airline tickets just don't jive
and the debt that you've accrued
all tax free, of course
cannot be denied
and they want to look
they want to verify
but it's a righteous indignation
unless they bring a warrant
when they ask next time, right?
so you burn, burn in hell
and take the rest of the wolves
amongst the flock with you as well
the Old Testament fire and brimstone
has fallen by the side
but you find yourself wishing
for an old fashioned cleansing
to kiss some of the pretenders
and the offenders, right goodbye |
|
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| tomorrow they'llbe back again |
[Dec. 9th, 2007|10:54 pm] |
the hours faded
I want them back
but they are gone
the silence broken
I want it back
but it's a noisy dawn
the quiet I enjoy
somewhere near 4am
and now I hear you calling
to the limited string of people
nowhere to go, nothing in hand
but this is where we live
and tomorrow you'll be back again
the rain now falling
over buildings tall and
the fog is filling in again
the pipe is coming
to your lips and smoking
knew we were close, but not like this
no one is looking, right?
no one will care, tonight?
there is no thought
there is only repulsion
the plague sends rats
and tomorrow they'll be back again
don't hate the diseased
you can despise the symptoms
and try to live with them
no one can get past them
in the enclaves and the communes
the modern kind
where the inspectors come to cleanse and condemn |
|
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| ends |
[Dec. 9th, 2007|10:48 pm] |
I knew from the picture
I knew from the description
a familiar decor
a familiar location
and now I hear
the floor is doused in blood
and now I see
how far we have not come
it's hard to put one
foot in front of the other
it's hard to make dollars
it's easy to murder
it's hard to attain
it's easy to gain
and the violation swims around
as they send someone else to a grave
it's not guns that kill
it's the idiot behind the trigger
it was harder in the days
of armor and swords, you figure
too many people fill the fishbowl
and not enough water for the like
and the man who dribbles down the food
we wonder if he maybe died
it's hard to make
it's easy to take
it's hard to find grace
it's easy to be a disgrace
when you add one stain
on top of the others
you never think about
the fact they have a mother |
|
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| hate me |
[Nov. 11th, 2007|01:05 am] |
there's a lady who looks like
a worn out MILF from another life
there with a shell of a man
that I'm sure she neutered
when he put a ring on her hand
and I hear she's looking at me
and she's got a little chuckle going
that nose is big enough
she's sprain her fucking neck
trying to look down at me
and as I get up
and as I walk by
I make sure to look in her eye
and scratch my temple and smile
with my middle finger
I wear what I want
and I don't care
I talk how I do
let them fucking stare
I got metal in my head
and never broke a bone
let them hate me
I'm oblivious and I'll never know
I can tell you my faults
chapter and verse
I can tell you my self-esteem
was carried off in some ancient hearse
I can tell you my mind
was ripped from the inside
I can tell you my emotions
have been trampled by the unyielding motion
of a life lived out of sheltered lines
and of making up the rules just to survive
I may be doing it wrong
but somehow I survive
so hate me if you'd like
my clothes show wear
from work I've done
my skins shows lines
from the troubles come
my hair is heading to gray
from the stress and fear
my system doesn't recover as fast as it did
and I'm sure you give a shit what I've been through
and I'm sure that I make no sense to you
so just hate me, it'll be easier for both of us it's true
I don't give a fuck about you, your opinion
or anyone else's as far as that goes |
|
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| inverse |
[Nov. 11th, 2007|01:00 am] |
I turned the volume down
drowning in the ugly sound
of an amalgamation
of what someone else already had to say
new voices sound like yesterday
and I prefer it that way
you can't carbon copy soul
or roll it off the purple roll
heart has died
and has been tossed into the grave
amateurs are all around
the medium to express they found
and greed has yet to find a way
to harvest, so it will make them pay
I turned the volume off
my migraine, sensitivity it's caused
my bran don't want to think
and no I don't need a drink at all
feet shuffle in the hall
and then the back slides against the wall
it's like a scene from days gone by
the television shows a line
the flower blooms and then explodes to gray
we're seeping out
they're soaking up
and we don't even see the cut
piece by piece so slow they take away
when the forest falls we'll be on holiday |
|
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| tunnel vision |
[Nov. 11th, 2007|12:54 am] |
shoulders are sinking
and my knees feel a mess
hamstrings and quads on fire
I inherited this mess
turn up the white noise
turn down the phone
close down the arteries
give it no exit road
no one reads
they all want to write
no one works
they want to dance all night
and fuck supermodels
drink martinis with gin
I always liked vodka
but I never liked it here
fluorescent tunnel vision
and designer pain on ice
the grass is much greener
but the ditches aren't so nice
came around the corner
saw the rabbit on the run
but when Hawaii crept so close
there was no sign or trace
just fur and blood to taste
no one sings
they just mouth all the lyrics
no one cares
they've adopted the guise of the idiot
somewhere there's a village
that needs a cable run
and maybe I'll bat a ton
and bat my eyes real cute
but it would still be lost
no matter what I do
no one screams
they just choke and stress out
no one feels
they just smile around
or close and lock the door |
|
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| don't want to see the sun |
[Nov. 11th, 2007|12:51 am] |
I drew the blinds
because I don't want to see the sun
no one knows I came here
I went off like a loaded gun
bathed in crystals
and dried in suburbia
in the middle of nowhere
don't animals always run?
hear me now
or there won't be a later
want to have a conversation
with the creator
you cruel fucking bastard
tell me you couldn't have done
more with this place
but you're not the only one
I drew the blinds
because I don't want to see the sun
draw the bath and soak
watch the steam rise above
it's cold as Alaska
but I keep thinking of Saskatchewan
or maybe to Alberta
don't animals always run?
hear me now
or there won't be a later
what was once was a hole
is a big cargo freighter
dumped out to tariff and customs agents
don't want to talk
there'll be no debate here |
|
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| deeper |
[Oct. 30th, 2007|11:42 pm] |
I sat and stared
out of the window, downtown
I sat and stared
hit by the realization
they say the day comes
when you feel your age
and you realize just how much
this life can be a drain
to wake up every day
but how else to have a roof?
some of us weren't so lucky
to be validated as a truth
the lines start to show
hair begins to gray
voice grows deeper
harder every day
the clock it ticks
I hear it's blade
only a matter of time
we were always designed this way
I sit and ponder
I sit and think
I sit and reject
I sit and breathe
resignation to the damnation
walk the seventh ring of hell
I know this depression
and the feeling far too well
and on days like this
I take to the road
winding up the Babel
winding down in a canto
Dante calls for direction
I give none, but take a few
and the prince-like tendencies
all of none to come true
the lines grow more prominent
the system less resistant
the mind more resilient
thinking about providence
the luck to stay unbroken
the drive to find the token
voice speaks like the prophet
what does it say?
what do you have to say? |
|
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| for you, for yourself |
[Oct. 30th, 2007|11:37 pm] |
open arms, open wide
darkness comes to swallow all in sight
locks up and down and now
we all throw away the key
it's politics and policies
the way it has to be?
swimming in a bowl
that cannot contain your girth
swimming in an ocean
that was not the place of your birth
for you
never for anyone else
for you
never forced to tell
open up the closet
look into the well
for yourself
do what's best for yourself
isn't that what you always do
even if it's by another name
it could never be true
thrown to the side
thrown to the wolves
broken empty shells
broken, black and blue
thrown to the room
thrown to the night
devoid of feeling
devoid of life
I watch you use them up
I watch you changing
I watch you clinging
I watch you dangling
metamorphosis
come out of your cocoon
I never really knew you
if this monstrosity is true
for you
so great and high
for you
the queen of lies
think your shit doesn't stink
when you're lying on the floor
tap a vein
suck the pipe
and go begging off for more
there's no love
there's no hate
just cold indifference and sadness
like you hold for yourself
I'll light the pyre and start the wake |
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| world, is this? |
[Oct. 30th, 2007|11:32 pm] |
the city's on fire
but there's no water
left here, to put it out
could've been prevented
but the powers that be
irresponsibly, let it slip out
co-operation not requested
but demanded
by the lossless crowd
and shouts of we need
are all you hear in the streets
so frequently now that you don't stop
to let them get the explanations out
what kind of world is this?
we've turned the criminals into kids
we keep the real human nature hid
so cynical, but you have to be
to keep from getting fucked over
by the animals mixed in between
I watched the news today
and I tried
but I just had to tune it out
stealing from the dying
blinding the deaf
and raping the handicapped
seems there's no taboo left
in a world with no conscience
filled to the brim with violence
what difference is there left that anyone can make?
what kind of world is this
that the elements
let it become such a disaster
let it become such a have to case
if you need evidence of evolution
this would be the specimen
of it going in reverse |
|
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| walking to the grave |
[Oct. 24th, 2007|11:16 pm] |
I've never met my neighbor
we see each other in the hall
speak a word
exchange a package when the mailman fails
to make his mark, and doesn't call
I hear the footfalls on the ceiling
picture shaking on the wall
is he cutting bodies
to slip into the compactor
or running wind sprints down his hall?
from whence I came
where everyone knew your name
now where everybody tried to forget your face
unless they need you
or happen to see you
as a fitting part of some piece
in the puzzle of the middle
of these lives which we cannot escape
walking to the grave
I never see the same cars
in the traffic lines every day
same time, same road, same place
but for each and every chapter
there seems to be a different face
I never see a change
taking different points
finding distractions to ease the pain
couldn't make the money in the middle of nowhere
the scenery is great, but you can't eat black or cyan
from whence I came
where everybody knew your name
and it wasn't all chains
and the center wasn't super
kids in pickup trucks
with beer in solo cups
wishing to get out
wishing for a place like this
wishing to not be anonymous
wishing to leave home and be known
but you're more anonymous
in a place that doesn't want to know
unless you can do something for
someone who's walking to the grave |
|
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| in daydreams |
[Oct. 24th, 2007|11:09 pm] |
wasn't ready to get out of bed
not much choice in that
step out in the dim light for a cigarette
my lungs hadn't come on line yet
cars passing down the road so fast
too early to join the cast
days like this and I want to drive
turn the radio up and feel alive
window down and the fall breeze blows
car drifting across the road
but there's no money for the exploits I plan
so I roll with the routine that's in my hand
daydreams have died
daydreams have ceased to be
unless you sing
unless you act
unless you fuck
the world in the ass
I see the entitled pissing it
away like so much air
daydreams have ceased to be
they cost too much reality
had to go down early and take a rest
couldn't stand the walls that line
people talking and it's hurting my head
as they babble on in my mind
dream of snow and cold and rain
dream of trees that god didn't make, here
dream of tea and a cigarette
another system is what I get
days like this and I want to give
notice and find colder climates
days like this and I want to live
like a modern Sal Paradise
but Mexico City has never been
on my list of places to see
much too warm and like the reality
in which I find myself this day
daydreams have ceased to be
daydreams still haunt me
standing on the deck staring off into the treeline
mountain rising in the distance behind
and we plot and we plan
and we get so far behind
I'm the only one who sees
it's only meaningful to me
on mornings and days like this
in daydreams |
|
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| flesh (bound in) |
[Oct. 24th, 2007|11:04 pm] |
I analyze
until I bleed inside
I still castigate and immolate
for mistakes I made
when I was five
I analyze
until I'm raw inside
and any word you say
will become the fuel
to light fuse and blow my confidence away
see, I'm not nothing
see, I'm not anything
worth the flesh I'm bound in
and that doesn't seem like much to me
I reinvent
to become that which I like
but who I really am
chokes it to death
in the deepest, black heart of the night
I reacquaint
my senses with my evil
try to say mellow
you might even call it yellow
but hit the right switch and watch me bring the storm
see, I've ridden hurricanes
see, I've ridden my brain
I rode the silver waters
and I rode the lusher pastures
I'm not anything
maybe just some thing
worth the flesh I'm bound in
and that don't seem like much to me |
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